My duck visited her in 2000. Now she's finally making her way here. I think. Maybe I'll treat her to some sponge
But if not Sue, why not squid instead? After all, if Sentosa's Underwater World could actually tote out a rather crabby (apologies to Joe!) showcase of chitinous claws, I am sure an exhibition of chillied cephalopods fronted by this giant sotong, even if fixed in formalin, would draw huge crowds who could perhaps bid for a bite of its bitter mantle. You could have accompanying pageants for Singapore's Sotong King & Queen (as determined by the greatest number of trivia questions unanswered by a contestant), and a baby
octopus show that would demonstrate, nay mimic how these aquatic lumps attached to gangly limbs flop helplessly on dry land.
There could be paintball competitions using guns filled with indelible cuttlefish ink. And in keeping with the national go-ahead for greater involvement in
gambling risk-taking, squid races could be held and odds taken, with the winner bedecked in coconut sauce and the losers sliced for hokkien mee. What better way to celebrate the nation's political culture than an anthropomorphic assay that lauds an order of creatures with traits beloved of rulers – soft, spineless and a byword for cluelessness!